True Detective - The Secrets of Clue

I can sense the question burning on the tip of your tongue: "Can you walk through closed doors in Clue?" This was the debate that has plagued my brain and peeved my friends. 

Let me make this completely clear…I am CERTAIN that you can walk through any door that is placed on the board. Mr. Whatshisface who owns the Clue mansion does not walk around at night locking half of the doors and leaving half of them open, and he shouldn't be obligated to prop every door open either (that wastes energy right?). 

After a heated exchange with some of my friends, I decided to do some research into the history of Clue as a board game. Clue was originally "Cluedo", and on the first board game, there were actually no doors whatsoever. Unfortunately, the original Cluedo was revamped with new graphics to sell more, as almost all board games are. 

the 1949 original Cluedo…without doors

Newer versions with trendy graphics showed the same game with the same rules. Some versions even depicted the rooms with every door shut. If shut doors prevent the characters from entering rooms, this particular version might result in a dull game where no one is ever able to investigate the murder unless it was committed in the hallways.

My version of Clue…with all closed doors

I understand that everyone has different ways of playing board games, but I decided to dive deeper into the mystery of the mystery board game's doors. I looked into online forums where people discussed what they thought of the closed doors. People claimed the doors were "just the artist's choice" and "a doorway is a doorway." My position is heavily supported, and on Cluedofan.com/FAQ, it is stated, "You can go through any of the doorways…whether the door is open or shut." 

So I think I've done sufficient research to please my own curiosity, but unfortunately I doubt I will ever be able to convince my friends. They read some tiny rule in the only rulebook we have, in Spanish (most likely the statement that a door can be blocked by another player), and are not relenting to the fact that Mrs. White, Miss Scarlet, Colonel Mustard, Mr. Green, Professor Plum, and Miss Peacock are fully capable of operating a door.

Signing Off,

Mr. Shawn in the Dorm Room with a Computer

(Serial Parody) Dorm Room Detective - Part IV (The Final Post)

Previously on Dorm Room Detective: Either my roommate or one of my suite-mates was messing with my stuff over the Thanksgiving break. My pillows were messed up, and I feared that my bed had been slept in. I speculated who committed the crime and interviewed the quiet suite-mate.

Let me just start by saying that I am in the best mood to write this post as I ever will be. Life is going well, I had good food today, and it was the last day for my two week contacts so all I had to do at the end of the day was slide them out of my eyes and into the trashcan. If there were ever a moment where I could lay aside my biases against my irritating roommate Sam and write out a logical report, it would be now.

This isn't really an unbiased thing to do, but I'm going to discard Moi as a suspect. He would not have done it. If I could bring up character witnesses they would all prove my point.

So that leaves us with Sam and Josh.

Let me just give a little more detail about Josh's character. Josh is a very honest person. When he ate other people's food, he admitted it right when they asked him about it. He can be awkward, but he isn't the type of person to lie. He told me straight to my face that he knew nothing about my pillows being moved.

Last time I questioned Josh, so I decided to confront Sam.

Me: "Josh and Moi both said that they didn't know anything about [the pillow situation]."
Sam: "I don't know anything about it."
Me: "I still just want to figure out what happened."
Sam: "I wasn't even around Shawn."
later…
Sam:"That's just like a weird thing to do, like why would I do that? You know what I mean?"
Me: "Well it's a weird thing for anyone to do, so why would anyone do it?"
Sam: "I would be curious to know."

So I see that I might come across as the weird roommate here, the annoying person accusing Sam of moving my pillows when there is a change he didn't do it. After all, he was away for two days. But the break was five days, and he keeps trying to flaunt his two day alibi. What I can't record in a word for word transcription is his actions: his nervous, overly conversational demeanor. Picture a chuckling teddy bear and stick an ugly face on it (harsh but true). Sam's behavior throughout this whole situation was off.

Struggling for some honest responses, I sent out an email to Moi, Josh, and Sam.

Email to Moi, Josh, and Sam

No response. So I sent out individual text messages…first time I ever had a use for the numbers we exchanged at the beginning of the year.

"Hey _____, this is Shawn. If you had to guess who switched me and chris's pillows over Thanksgiving, who would you guess? Just say a name (even if you're not positive)."

This was the vote that it had come down to. Both Moi and Sam responded with some form of "Oh but I'm really not sure who did it."Josh, on the other hand, sent back only three letters: "Sam".

This could be taken in two different ways. Josh could be blaming Sam to deflect the blame away from himself. Or he could be telling me that the most logical person who committed the atrocious crime WAS Sam.

Josh is a blunt truth teller, and I believe him. Sam is a slithery people pleaser who would hate to admit to wrongdoing (When a party of his got busted, he denied that anyone was drinking. When the RA's asked to come into the room, he told them, "I'd rather you not." He ended up getting everyone in way more trouble).

Knowing everything I know about these people, I think I can say with only a little doubt that Sam committed the crime. In the Dorm Room Justice System, you're guilty until proven innocent, and I'm the judge.

Thank you for reading. #DormRoomDetective

(Serial Parody) Dorm Room Detective - Part III

Previously on Dorm Room Detective: I came home from Thanksgiving break to find my pillows had been moved to my friend Chris's bed and his were on mine. In the previous post I detailed the different characters/suspects.

At this point in my investigation, there is a very comforting conclusion that I have come to: more likely than not, no one was actually sleeping in either my or Chris's bed.

The evidence of this was there all along. My bed was just as messy as always and Chris's was nicely tucked in. The only thing askew: the pillows. Furthermore, who would be idiotic enough to sleep in one bed and then switch pillows with another bed. This leads me to believe that only our pillows were mistreated (still a treacherous deed).

My Bed with Chris's pillows

Chris's Bed with my pillows

We are still, however, faced with the question: Who? Who would use my pillows? What was their motive to commit this crime?

Today, I spoke with Josh about the events that occurred over the Thanksgiving holiday (Nov 26-30). He is the final witness who could have provided clues to the situation. Here is an excerpt out of (short) conversation.

Me: "Hey Josh, were you here over the Thanksgiving break?
Josh: "Yeah."
Me: "Do you know if anybody had any guests over?"
Josh: "Not that I know of"
Me: "Alright, just 'cause when I came back all of my pillows were on Chris's bed and all of Chris's pillows were on my bed."
Josh: "I don't know anything about that."
Me: "You don't think that [Sam] had any guests over or anything?"
Josh: "I was actually out of the suite most of the time."
Me: "Ok."

Not much substance…I know. So Josh didn't know anything about the pillows, and he denied even being in the apartment much. This story was backed up by Moi, who had stated that Josh was usually out of the room. Josh IS capable of taking things that aren't his, but I cannot believe that he would cross the threshold and come into my room, and for what…to borrow my pillows?

To review the facts…
Kyle, Chris, and myself were all out of town for the weekend. This leaves Sam, Josh, and Moi. Only Sam lives in the room. Moi and Josh have never even entered my room to my knowledge. Josh is gone most of the days and comes back at night. Sam claims that he left the door unlocked over the weekend and was gone on Thursday and Friday. Everyone is denying knowing anything about the pillows.

The more I think about the situation, the weirder I realize it is. First, I was furious, thinking that someone had slept in my bed. Then, I was calmed, believing that only my pillows were touched. Finally, I was perplexed, because what could have happened with my pillows.

Did someone use them to host friends on our couches in the common space and then forget which bed they went on? This seems unlikely because both Moi and Josh would have seen if Sam had friends over, and Moi would have seen Josh's friends and vice versa. They aren't the type of people to cover for each other…not friends. Did Sam come home in a drunken stupor and have a pillow fight with his lonely self? This is honestly the best bet and my personal guess at the sequence of events of the crime.

Next on Dorm Room Detective: I confront Sam. The evidence is stacked against him. I won't stop until I figure out at least part of the story. Someone is lying, and I will get to the bottom of it, even if I have to call the first suite meeting of the semester (we never did fill out our required roommate agreements).

I have begun to use voice memos on my iPod, and will make attempts to keep clear records of the events that transpire throughout this investigation.

(Serial Parody) Dorm Room Detective - Part II (The Characters)

Previously on Dorm Room Detective: I came home after the Thanksgiving break to find that someone had messed with my room. My pillows were switched with the pillows on my roommates bed (Someone may have slept in our beds without our knowledge). Apparently our door was left unlocked by our third roommate, who claims to have nothing to do with the egregious deed.

Unfortunately there is not any new information to add at this moment, but I thought I would take just a minute to introduce you all to the characters in this situation. I live in a six person suite with two rooms. I have three suite-mates and two roommates.

Chris: (Roommate) Chris is a great guy, one of my best friends in college. Responsible, intelligent, fruit fly assassin. Chris is the second victim in this unforgivable crime, and there is no chance that he had anything to do with its planning, considering he was gone to Boston before I left and back to New York after I returned.

Sam: (Roommate) Sam is basically a blob. He used to annoy me, but then he just stopped doing anything of interest. He lies in bed for more than twenty four hours some days, but he's always trying to pretend like he is on top of his academic and social game. I rarely talk to him at all, but after mentioning the pillow switch up to him, he became incredibly talkative…asking me about my break and telling me about his. Suspicious…if you ask me.

Moi: (Suite-mate) Moi is overall a good guy. He enjoys architecture(?) and watching movies. Personally, I would believe his statements. His only problem is that he never washes his dishes.

Josh: (Suite-mate) Josh is a bit of a wild card. You don't really know what is going to happen with him, but I wouldn't expect him to go into my room. He has, however, been known to eat other people's food without showing remorse and (allegedly) use my shampoo.

Kyle: (Suite-mate) Kyle is kind of irrelevant to this story, considering he was out of the picture for the weekend. Kyle seems like a nice kid anyway, not the type of person to sleep in your bed without asking you.


Next on Dorm Room Detective (If all goes according to plan), I will actually interview Josh and try to get more information out of Sam, there's something he isn't telling me. He is suspicious.

(Serial Parody) Dorm Room Detective - Part I

On the trip home to my dorm in New York City, I was listening to a podcast about the murder of a young woman and a shady trial that placed a seventeen year old boy in prison for life. The woman narrating the podcast goes back and tries to track down the clues to the events that happened on January 13, 1999 (http://serialpodcast.org).

When I arrived back to my room after the five day Thanksgiving break, I noticed that something was obviously off. I have two roommates, one who left for the break hours before me (Chris), and one who stayed in New York for the weekend (Sam). When I walked through the door to my room, I saw my pillows lying on Chris's bed and Chris's pillows on mine. I knew my new quest would be to uncover the evidence, and to get to the bottom of this despicable deed, just as Sarah Koenig does in Serial.

I'm going to lay out the facts. This is what I know:
- Chris left the dorm on Wednesday around 7am, while I was still sleeping
- I left the room at approximately 9:30am on Wednesday.
- When I arrived back at my dorm room at 3:20, Sam was lounging on the couches in the common space and Chris and my pillows were switched.

I decided to do a little digging:
- When I casually asked Sam if someone had been sleeping in my bed, he aggressively stated: "I didn't sleep in your bed!" He had thought I asked if he had been sleeping there.
- Upon further questioning I found that he claimed to have been out of the room on both Thursday and Friday, celebrating Thanksgiving at a friend's house in Brooklyn.
- He stated that he forgot to lock our door.
- Additionally he claimed that our suite-mate (Kyle) had been out of town for the weekend.

That only left the two other suite-mates as potential suspects - Josh and Moi, if Sam is to be believed, that is… I later saw Moi and decided to question him: (Moi is a relatively trustworthy source, especially compared to Sam.)
- Moi stated that he had been in for the whole weekend, and that Kyle had indeed been out of town and was coming back later today.
- He stated that Josh was out most of the days but came back at night.
- To his knowledge, there hadn't been any big parties or unexpected guests, but he may just not have seen them.
- The door to Moi, Kyle, and Josh's room is almost always closed, and unlike my room, sound doesn't readily travel into their room. Guests could easily have come and gone without his noticing.

These are the facts, and I suppose some of my opinions. To my knowledge, nothing was stolen. Not the obvious $10 bill I left in a drawer of my desk, not anything (that I could see).


Next on Dorm Room Detective, I will interview Josh, go over the facts with Chris, and try to get more information out of Sam, there's something he isn't telling me. He is suspicious.

If I had a nickname...

I've never had a nickname. I guess Shawn isn't really a name you can shorten, so if I had a nickname it would have to be something different.

I recently decided what I would want my nickname to be. I think my nickname should be "Laze". It defines me so well. I love Lays Potato Chips (I certainly cannot just eat one) and I can be pretty lazy.

Just today I woke up at 3pm and bought a bag of Lays from the store on the first floor of my dorm. Too lazy to wake up early, too lazy to go to a real grocery store…classic Laze. Classic Laze eats Classic Lays.

Comic Con, The Tonight Show, and Olive Garden

In the past week, I have been to New York Comic Con, The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, and Olive Garden. I can say truthfully that I was most happy at Olive Garden. 

Comic Con just seemed like a place for nerdy people to waste money. I love television, including many shows featured at Comic Con, but there was nothing really that interesting. When I asked around to see what people liked about Comic Con, they replied that it was not the panels/screenings, but the whole experience. The experience of irritated celebrities stuck signing photos and repetitive tables of merchandise is simply not captivating to me.

The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon was amazing as always, but it was stressful. Stressful because the group in front of us got kicked out for booking with another group of people, which was exactly what my group of friends had done. Stressful because we had to stand right behind our friends and pretend like we didn't know each other. And stressful because I waited for a friend who showed up literally seconds before they stopped ticket redemption.

At Olive Garden I was happy. 

I have a passion for Olive Garden. It seems sacrilegious considering I live across the street from Little Italy, but it's true. I went to Olive Garden an innumerable amount of times during my junior year of high school; however, until yesterday, I hadn't tasted the Garden for almost a year. 

The Never Ending Pasta Bowl filled my stomach and my heart. 

Evidence for ADD

When I was in high school, I was convinced I had ADD. I would stare around the room in class and zone out the teacher. I told my mom I wanted to get diagnosed so I could get extra time on the SAT and ACT, but she said no. She didn't want me using it as an excuse (and I definitely would have). But I am journaling to provide some evidence for why I do have ADD.

Today I had my midterm for Financial Accounting. Definitely not my favorite class, but the textbook isn't too bad because it gives examples of Chipotle's Accounting, and whenever I am bored in class, I imagine Skyler White from Breaking Bad cooking the books, and realize that I will be capable of doing that if I continue Accounting.

But halfway through my exam I noticed a scab on my arm, and I spent at least five minutes picking at it (sorry). By the time the test ended, I hadn't completed my exam. Five minutes more probably would have helped.

Oh well, I don't think I failed. #KeepThatScholarship

Exam Tomorrow #FML

I have read four pages of my Economics of Global Business textbook this year. I consider this a great accomplishment; however, it may not be enough to help me do well on my exam tomorrow.

Those four pages were only a fraction of the nearly two hundred pages and eleven chapters I was supposed to read by tomorrow. But just hear me out. This is the MOST BORING book I have ever read in my life. There is not a single picture, only words (not even interesting ones).

So I guess my only hope is reviewing the previous years tests my professor posted online, even though he said explicitly, "Make sure you have read the textbook, it is very important." But I passed my driver's permit test by just taking a few of the online tests, so why can't this be any different?

I forget everything.

Last year I forgot to go to my art final. I've forgotten countless NYU events over the past year. I always forget where I put my phone/wallet/iPod. I forget a lot of people's names. And most common of all, I forget my homework. 

Today I am writing this journal/blog entry because I am sitting down at Starbucks in Rockefeller Center, one hour after I was supposed to meet my friend and her mom before we go to a concert. I am sitting here eating my semi-delicious Everything with Cheese bagel because after I got on the subway I realized I forgot my ticket to the concert at the dorm. So I turned back and was way too late for dinner reservations. 

I need to start remembering things. My old boss always said "You forget everything! Write it down!" 

I just took out my contacts!

Last week I was forced to journal my experience at an unpleasant "service" event with my school.

My friends told me my journal entry would make a funny blog. Shout out to Julia Louisa Dreyfus and Stephanie Downs. Now I'm starting my blog.

I don't really care about this post, I'm just excited to format my page. Expect it to be cool. I might YouTube "How to make a cool blog". We shall see.

If this goes out and sends a stupid notification to all my Google+ contacts, then HELLO!

I've spent 20 minutes looking for font size on this thing.