Soda is already a very addictive substance. My mom was addicted to Dr. Pepper for many years, and her struggle to wean herself off of it was difficult and similar to the efforts of someone quitting cigarettes. But I am not addicted to soda, I am addicted to Candy Crush Soda Saga.
Hopefully acknowledging my Soda Crush addiction will be the first in many steps to beating it. To be honest, I don't even really enjoy playing Soda Crush, but for the past week, I go to sleep thinking about those tiny candies and wake up imagining them matching up by color.
A few days ago I told my friends that I was going to quit, but that still hasn't happened. This love of Soda Crush actually scares me. I sit at home during this winter break playing this terrible game when there is so much more I should be doing. These are my last few days before I go back to college, and instead of working on internship applications and seeing friends who I won't see for many months, I am playing a stupid game on my iPod.
I know that sometimes people quit addictions gradually, so my plan is to play a real quick game after I finish this blog post and then to gradually play less until I quit. I hope it works!
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
Consider Rose
In Titanic, Rose Dawson remarks, "I saw my whole life as if I'd already lived it. An endless parade of parties and cotillions, yachts and polo matches."
But is all life just endless repetition?
In high school, I thought (and everyone told me) I could just work hard to get into a good college and then I could relax. Well not really relax, but you get the sense that things will be less stressful.
These days I'm applying to internship positions and it eerily mimics college apps. There are the reaches and the good fits (unfortunately there aren't any safeties). It's slightly different from college apps, but it's the same stress…the same dreadful sense that your future happiness hangs in the balance.
After college it will be job applications. And a job is your career - the launch of your adult life. Work experience seems even more significant to your future than internships and education.
And after your in a job, you'll probably be trying to find a better job, or a promotion in the job you're in. Always trying to climb the mandatory ladder of life.
I see my whole life as if I've already lived it. An endless parade of applications, stress, grey hairs, and unattainable fulfillment.
I don't really see what's wrong with the parties and yachts.
P.S. All of this thought comes from a smaller instance of repetition. I am on winter break from college, and I have a set routine that starts at night: I watch HBO Go and play Trivia Crack until 2A.M. when I go to sleep. I set a slew of alarms from 10A.M. to 12P.M. because otherwise I wouldn't ever wake up. I then slowly make the transition to the shower and the TV downstairs and spend the rest of my day applying for internships and seeking out some form of a meal.
This lengthy winter break is torturously monotonous, and it leaves my brain mountains of time to overthink life...
But is all life just endless repetition?
In high school, I thought (and everyone told me) I could just work hard to get into a good college and then I could relax. Well not really relax, but you get the sense that things will be less stressful.
These days I'm applying to internship positions and it eerily mimics college apps. There are the reaches and the good fits (unfortunately there aren't any safeties). It's slightly different from college apps, but it's the same stress…the same dreadful sense that your future happiness hangs in the balance.
After college it will be job applications. And a job is your career - the launch of your adult life. Work experience seems even more significant to your future than internships and education.
And after your in a job, you'll probably be trying to find a better job, or a promotion in the job you're in. Always trying to climb the mandatory ladder of life.
I see my whole life as if I've already lived it. An endless parade of applications, stress, grey hairs, and unattainable fulfillment.
I don't really see what's wrong with the parties and yachts.
P.S. All of this thought comes from a smaller instance of repetition. I am on winter break from college, and I have a set routine that starts at night: I watch HBO Go and play Trivia Crack until 2A.M. when I go to sleep. I set a slew of alarms from 10A.M. to 12P.M. because otherwise I wouldn't ever wake up. I then slowly make the transition to the shower and the TV downstairs and spend the rest of my day applying for internships and seeking out some form of a meal.
This lengthy winter break is torturously monotonous, and it leaves my brain mountains of time to overthink life...
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